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Ep 29 | Do You Value Your Value?

Uncategorized Jul 14, 2022

Why do we diminish our value in the first place? We are often taught in business that we need to create value, but the reality is very different from this! In this episode, Zach explains how to create your own value in your business that truly reflects not only your passion for your calling in life but your true purpose.

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Zach Arend: We attract who we are. So if you're somebody who's playing small, diminishing who you are diminishes your value, you're gonna attract people that are comfortable with doing the same thing.

Welcome back, or welcome to the Create Purpose Podcast. Today's episode. I wanna talk about one of the number one challenges. I see for business owners and that is that they diminish their own value and that comes through in how they price their products, their services, and how they spend their time. And there's three ways that I think we get caught up in this, this trap of diminishing our values.

And this is a very important topic today because I think. Until you start to recognize your own value and own it in, in, in everything and how you show up, as a leader in your business, how you price your products, your services, and what you allow and don't allow when it comes to customer requests and expectations, because when you don't value your services or your product to the level, I know you could, you start to make a lot of exceptions.

You start to make compromises and, you know, fall into the trap of, or maybe people pleasing a little too much. And in the end you kind of feel like, well, when am I gonna get paid? What I really wanna get paid? You know? And, and we, we were left waiting, waiting for the day where we actually can realize our value and, you know, the common teaching.

In business is our job. As business owners, we've gotta create that value. We've gotta go out there and, and create the value. But I think that's a distraction from just owning and knowing what your value is because at the end of the day, at the end of the day, it's a choice. You and I, we get to decide what our value is and that value might prevent some people from working with us or buying our products.

But I promise you, there is plenty of people that need you. They need your services, they want your products, and they're more than willing to pay for it. And so let's get into it because I wanna just, I wanna talk about this a little bit more. I wanna talk about why, and why do we diminish our value in the first place?

And this, these are coming from some experiences I've had personally, you know, I've, I've become aware of some traps I've fallen into, and then I've seen it come through with some of my, my clients. And so that's why I'm willing to bet some of these might resonate with you too. The first trap that we all get into, if we're diminishing our value more than likely we're falling into the comparison trap.

Because when you compare yourself to someone else, you diminish who you are. I gotta say that one again, cuz that is so important. Someone shared that with me years ago and it hit me like a ton of bricks. When you compare yourself to others, you diminish who you are. So for example, I have compared myself to other coaches out there, authors, you know, speakers, trainers, you know, they've been doing this for 10 years and I know what they charge.

I know what they charge. If you were to ask me, well, would you like to charge that? Absolutely. Absolutely. But here's the thing. The story I would tell myself is I, as I'm comparing myself to them, I would tell myself, well, I'm not, I'm not them. I'm not that person. I don't have as big a business as he does, or she does.

Therefore I can't charge what he or she charges. And, you know, we're so smart, right? This great rationalization for you to diminish your value for me to diminish my value. But you know what. At some point, we just have to decide that that's our value. We have to know what our value is and charge accordingly and own it.

Not apologize for it, not play small, not compare ourselves to other people and what they're charging and where they're at on their journey, where we're at on our journey. And therefore, if they're further along then we're not. And so we should value ourselves less. That's BS, that's BS. It really starts with the identity that you're taking on and really owning the value.

You bring really look at it, really look at it because I'm willing to bet you're already there. You might even be beyond there. And that's that's from a service perspective. What about a product? You know, I don't know about you, but you can buy the cheapest stuff on Amazon or you can, you can go and buy the best of the best and pay 10 X and people are, are buying both sides of the spectrum.

The question is really is like, well, who do you wanna work with? What type of person do you want buying your product? Because there's a marketplace to be the lowest cost for. There's also a marketplace to be the highest and best of the best luxury item. And it's just gonna, it's gonna attract a different customer.

So you have to know who your customer is, but you have to decide again, it's a decision, it's a decision. And if you compare yourself to some big brand that's out there that sells some amazing product. You again, compare yourself to that brand. Well, we haven't been at this as long as they have, you know, we don't have the brand recognition that they do.

So therefore we can't charge that. I want you to question that again, because there is just a principle that people value. What, what costs money. It just does, you know, like I do some trainings and workshops, right. And if I were just to give those things away for free. People more than likely may not even show up.

We don't value what we don't pay for. And I I'll tell you what, I, I just got a new watch and it's expensive to me, cuz I always were buying the citizen watches and the cheap $300 apple watches and you know, I really wanted a nicer watch and. There's a Rolex in my future, but I decided to go with the Sade.

I don't know if you know that brand it's it's actually, I think who owns that tag? It's a brand underneath tag. It's a little bit less expensive, but more expensive. I think it was like an $800 watch. Most I've ever spent on a watch. Now, could I have spent. 10 20,000 on a watch. Yeah, but that's my point is there's a market for anything.

So you get to decide your price point, but you have to value your own value. You can't diminish it. And we do that one by comparing ourselves to others. So that's the, that's the first thing I want you to think about is this idea of, of, are you comparing yourself to others and where they're at on their journey and therefore you have to be behind them.

Because you can just decide to play at their level. You just can decide and start being the best today being high end being world class. And that means charging high end charging world class. Right. Right. You get to decide now there will be people that say, no, not that's not for me. I can't afford that.

Or I don't wanna spend that, but there will be people that say, yes, I'm in sign me up. Send me send me, send me that product. And so that's the first, so don't compare yourself to others. You're just diminishing who you are and you're great. You get to be who you decide to be, and you get own that, and nothing will change until you do so.

That's, that's the first trap, the comparison trap. The second one, I'm gonna call this one, the humility trap. There is something about charging. More throughout the years of my business. Every time I think about charging more, the story of who do I think I am, that I can charge that. Like, and then I start telling myself a story of like, you're just being greedy.

You're just being greedy. You need to, you need to just be thankful that people are paying you. What they're paying you. Being humble be, you know, that humility. And I think it's just something I know I was taught at a young age, you know, like, you know, be humble. Don't, don't get too big for your britches.

Uh, don't get over your skis. Don't get too big of a head. Don't get greedy. I was taught that, you know, and all those lessons came from the right place. And fundamentally I agree with them, but we have to question what really is humility, because I'll tell you what. It takes a hell of a lot of humility to value your value and not diminish it, and then show up and play full out and put your behind on the line to deliver what that person paid for.

That takes humility too. And that changed things for me, in my perspective, in fact, it was way more comfortable for me to quote unquote, be humble and not charge what I really knew my value was. And diminish it. It's more comfortable to diminish your value. It just is. You don't have to deal with the rejection as much.

You also don't have to open yourself up to the rejection and the failure and good enough is good enough, cuz you're just charging. Good enough. So good enough is good enough. It takes off the pressure of you and I wanna demand more of you if you're listening. Cuz I wanna demand more of myself too. I know.

And I've experienced this the more I value my value. The more I attract the type of people that really inspire me and bring out the best for me as, as a coach. And I also know I work with clients, interior designers, artists jewelers, when they play up to the level that they aspire to play at all of a sudden the types of projects that they dream of start knocking on their door, the types of customers that are willing to spend the money.

They spend the money, but it doesn't start until we get over ourselves. We'll say, and stop walking around, being small and playing it safe and being humble and really owning our value. So I don't know. Where might you be being humble as a way to protect yourself from really playing full. In owning who, you know, you are and the value you, you really can offer in your service or the product you offer your clients.

So that's the second trap. The humility trap. The third trap is FOPO. Who's heard of FOPO, it's an acronym for fear of other people's opinions. This one's a big one. Once we get over ourself, now we have to worry about, well, what. What if they think I'm overpriced, what if, what if they laugh? What if they, what if they decide not to work with me?

What if they tell me? No. And, and then they go and they tell all their friends like, oh, don't work with him. Don't don't buy from her. She's she price gouges. Ya, he, he price gouges. You and I, I, you know, I got a reputation to think about. I got, you know, right. There's this fear of other people's opinions. And we're so afraid to just own who we are.

We apologize. Oftentimes we apologize for who we are by playing small, by not asking for the, the rates and the, the pricing that we ultimately wanna ask for all, because we're afraid of what other people will think. Here's the truth about that. People are going to think what they think, no matter what you do.

In this world is going to judge you just like, come on, have you, there is no way you can win in the eyes of all people. That's a losing game. So people are going to judge you. That's guaranteed. You know, they're gonna think what they're gonna think. And has nothing to do with you. And I really, it has all everything to do with their stories that they're telling themselves about life, their own belief systems and filters that they've, they've been taught, they've experienced.

And we all see the world through our own worldview. And that's really what determines what we deem is expensive or not, or, you know, whatever. And everybody's gonna have their own opinion. Everybody's gonna see it differently. So, what really matters is what's your opinion? What's your intention? What do you want?

What do you value yourself at without diminishing it? That's all that matters. You have to own who you are because people are gonna judge. No matter what you do so you can live a life of being afraid of what other people think. And they're still gonna think what they think they're still gonna judge you, but you're gonna have a life.

You know, I don't know. You're gonna maybe live a life of regret because you're gonna look back on your life and know you didn't really play to the level you knew you were capable of, or that you desired to play at. Maybe you don't know if you're capable of it or not, but if the desire's there, if there is a desire there.

Then why not just believe it's for you and go after it no more second guessing yourself. Can I really charge that? Do that be that, just start showing up that way and decide and be that way. And yeah. Are some people gonna, some of your old customers gonna leave probably because you changed, you stopped being that diminished part of you.

That, that part of it was apologizing for who you are and you know, and now we start playing. Up to the level who we know we are and we desire to be. And that might mean some people will have to, to leave our circle. Oftentimes that's the case because we kind of attract, you know, there's that saying of, we are the, the, what is, it's such a cliche thing.

I get tired of hearing it. We're the, we're the summation of the five people we spend the most time with or something I actually heard. The more I've thought about that. It's, it's not quite that. It's not about, like, we just become who we're surrounded with. Maybe that's true, but I think it's the other way around.

We attract the people in our lives. We attract who we are. So if you're somebody who's playing small, diminishing who you are diminishing your value, you're gonna attract people that are comfortable with doing the same thing. And you're gonna, you're gonna find yourself being one of those five people.

Right. But you are attracting those people to. Because the second you decide to change and, and own your identity and own really who you are and what you desire. All of a sudden relationships start to just shift. They work themselves out. Some people will leave, but the right people will show up. You will start to attract the people that are most like you.

So it's not that we change because of the people we're around the people around us change. When we change. And so, as long as you keep worrying about what other people are gonna think, you will diminish your value and you'll play much smaller than, than, you know, you really are. And you have a choice, you can be afraid of what other people think.

Or you can just tell yourself a story, like, you know, what people are going to think, what they think, what really matters is I believe and can own what I think. And I can back it up. I know my value and I'm not gonna apologize for it. I know the impact I can make. I know the quality of my product. I will not apologize for it.

There is a marketplace out there. There is a, the perfect customer out there waiting for what you and I have. I believe it. And, and my goal here is for you to believe it too, no more diminishing your value. No we're done. I just identified the, the, it makes sense that you do that you and I both do and have in the past, you know, because of the comparison or because we've been taught to be humble and not greedy, and because we fear other people's opinions, but Hey, you can choose to allow those three things to keep you from having what you ultimately want, or you can own it and you can step into owning your value.

No longer diminishing it. So this is a short episode. I hope it's helpful. I hope it just got you thinking a little bit about, Hmm. Am I really valuing my value or am I diminishing it in some way? And if so, write the ship. Just address it. Look at it closer and, and start to make incremental changes towards the value that you know you're worth.

So that's a wrap. Thanks for listening. I'll see you in the next episode!

Hopefully you really enjoyed this podcast episode. And my hope is you found it really inspirational. And also most importantly, I hope you took away some practical things that you can start to do and apply in your own life. So finally, I have one small favor to ask of you before you go, wherever you get your podcasts, whether that's Apple Music or Spotify.

If you enjoyed this episode, leave us a review. Love to hear your thoughts. Come find us on social media, share it on social media. It just really helps us get the word out, helps us grow our audience. So please do that. Thanks to my team, Ashley Bolden, who handles all the admin and Chris Skipper who handles all the music and editing of this podcast for more information on The Create Purpose podcast, you can go to, and you can also follow me on Instagram @zach.arend. Please drop me a comment, reach out, drop me a DM. I'd love to hear from you. I'd love to hear what you're taking away from these conversations. What would you like to hear more of? Do you have any guests that you would love to see come on the show? And I'm always looking for great people to talk to people with great stories that can inspire you. And so if you know of anybody, send them my way, love to hear from you. I'm your host, Zach Arend, and I'll see you in the next episode of the Create Purpose Podcast. Bye for now.